Some might laugh at the title of this post and think I’m a little odd and maybe a tad bit dramatic. When I say this though, lets be real, I’m kind of joking, but not entirely. Over the past few months I have read countless blogs on how I potty trained my child in 3 days, amazing tips to potty train your child quickly, and so on. What I haven’t seen anyone write about is how hard it is, and how defeated you feel! Honestly I think all those posts are ridiculous and possibly full of nonsense! Maybe those moms had toddlers that took to it really well, but I can tell you that my toddler sure isn’t.
I decided a few months ago that I wanted to try to start potty training soon. This was when I was pregnant and I really did not want two kids in diapers at the same time. Silas was showing all the signs of being ready to train. We had heard that if he can walk backwards (why is this an indicator??) and if he is letting me know that he has a dirty diaper then he is most likely ready to be potty trained. Silas had been telling me for months when he had a “stinky” as he liked to call it. He never liked to have a dirty or wet diaper for long and would always let me know when he wanted to be changed.
When I first started to give potty training a go, I really wasn’t that devoted to making it happen, so I can admit that this might have been my first mistake. We were going through a lot as a family and it just wasn’t my top priority. I kept Silas in diapers for the most part, but there were a few days that he wanted to try more and I would put a pull up on him just to make it easier on me. I would probably take him to the potty once an hour at this point if he was lucky. I didn’t know much about potty training, but I just wanted to get him introduced to the idea of it. I wasn’t exactly in a hurry to get him trained, but like I’ve said maybe this is where I went wrong. I’ve heard many times now that consistency is the key and I was definitely not consistent in the beginning.
After a couple weeks of taking him to the potty off and on daily, my normally sweet little Silas decided that he was going to rebel against this new idea mom had. He decided that any time I tried to take him to the potty he would kick and scream and it would end in a crying fit. After he did this a few times I gave up making him try to go. I would still ask him occasionally if he wanted to try to use the potty, but it was seldom that he wanted to for the most part. I didn’t want to turn him off completely from potty training, so I was not going to force him. I figured I would give him some time to do his thing and go back to it later.
Well this week is later I guess. We do a lot of random traveling; sometimes just to Springfield to run errands and see my family, other times we take short business trips with dad. This is the one week that we were going to be home all week, so I thought, “hey why not really focus on potty training this week.” The first day I had him in a pull up and I would try to take him to the potty every 30 minutes. If I’m being honest though, that didn’t really happen. I knew the pull up would still catch most of it, so I wasn’t making it my top priority and either was he. He did go a few times though and he would get a sticker every time he went potty on the potty chair which he really liked. Day 2 I decided to put him in his big boy underpants. He got excited about wearing them, but that was about where the excitement ended. The morning went pretty well. I actually did take him every 30 minutes to try to go potty, but he only went once and surprisingly didn’t have any messes at all. After his nap was a totally different story. I was still taking him every 30 minutes, but he only went once on the potty and had 3 accidents in one hour. At this point I just wasn’t sure if he was getting it because 2 out of those 3 accidents, he didn’t even notice and when I asked him if he had gone potty in his underpants he would say “no”. The rest of the days have been more or less the same as that first one with the underpants. There are times where I get completely tired of all of it and I put him back in his diaper for a couple hours.
My mother in law got us some training pants yesterday, so today was our first day trying those. He wet 4 of them just this morning and only told me about one of them. The training pants have more padding, so maybe it just feels more like a diaper to him. It just doesn’t seem to bother him when he is wet. Usually it’s not a large amount of pee, but I’m not comfortable putting him back in them or continuing to let him wear them, so it’s enough. Maybe it just isn’t the right time, or Silas Randall might just be really stubborn and prove to be very difficult to potty train. At this point I think we will keep trying, but it’s hard to be consistent when you feel like your child just isn’t getting it.
I know all these posts I read about getting it done in a few days and that being the only thing you focus on are not the norm. I’ve heard much different stories from other moms I’ve spoken to in person. If I can’t devote all my time to this as a stay at home mom, I can’t imagine how hard and time consuming it is for a working mom. Props to the moms that can do it in 3 days, or even a week, but I just want all the other moms of toddlers who are struggling with potty training and just want to give up sometimes to know, you are not alone! This has been my least favorite learning experience for Silas, and me but I know we have to stick with it and learn at some point. We have had some sweet times with potty training because he loves for me to read to him and sing him songs while he sits on the potty chair. It’s those moments that I can smile and know that it will all work out in the end, but like many things that come with motherhood, it will just take some devotion, time, and lots of prayer!